Wednesday, September 17, 2008

you'll be in my future.

When your life has been reduced a whiffel ball in the air, or bouncing off the concrete, a simple "I love you" is really all it takes. You said it tonight and how many times did I say it first whether to you or in my head? I'd like to hear it from your voice, but I'm terrible on the phone, advanced by things I cant comprehend and how you make me sweat beads into my eyes.

I don't go to school on days when it seems pointless and today was ideal. I think I texted you but I'm sure it was horribly un-impulsive because I was half asleep when school started at nine.

"I've spent the time since March learning to hate you, trying to ignore my feelings for you, and I can't do it. I'll tell ya, it takes a real bitch to treat someone the way you treated me. I should know..."

I'd be happy to die for a taste of what Angel had. Someone to live for---unafraid to say I love you.

The scheme of all schemes has been plotted and I swear I took no part but I'm willing to bet my captainship that you'll be pissed and honey you'll have to deal with that. I lived here first, my picture is on the wall, and the photo albums have my face plastered on their pages. This is my territory and Patty feels the same way. You're honestly not welcome, but just like Mina, my cousin will have to learn from her own mistakes, but I am right about you.

When push comes to pull, you're too busy complaining about your mistakes to be there. You're watching the symphony and can't hear your best friend calling, crying, begging for help. And you don't give a damn, so neither do I. I've tried this hatred thing and it only makes more misery so I know you're a miserable person. I know you more than you think, Belle, and I always will. People don't just decide to move on and we're not finished here, I promise. See you Friday night.