Around, I'm, Not, While,

You eluded me for almost seven months. You avoided me, hid from me, and teased me with your absence. I resorted to other methods of your purpose, using and abusing, throwing away the waste like garbage, which it technically could be defined as. It was a horrible frame, there was terrible quality, and honestly, I was embarrassed when I showed people and the looks on their faces understood that I was only compensating for the loss of you and your handy companionship. I missed you digital camera.

There are stains on the back of my T-shirt from oil and moldy backseats after french fries, mops, and overheating engines. The rain was inviting and refreshing when I walked home in untied forest converse and Bishop moore Hornets shorts. The game is scheduled, but tonight was a waste, though the pizza behind was satisfactory. My standards are too high, I tell myself, and inside I agree.

I explained myself in full but I cant understand why I should be treated like the plague. I did everything for you. Why shouldnt I be proud for being the best friend I could? It wasn't good enough for you, but I learned about best friends. They suck. and I hate you. Can I not go one fucking blog without writing about how you left me? It was fucking March. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!! Im sick of this, either talk to me or leave my brain alone because this constant reminder of where you're at, and where I've landed myself is enough to insert suicidal thoughts, which you would call "dramatic and" I would retort "reality" because you couldn't handle the life I've lived; am living, bitch. You'd die. and you fucking know it.

Everytime I think of you, I remember how much I loved you, and how much I still, to this day, after everything that's happened, feel for you in the bottom of ym heart. I know what love feels like. and When i think of you, it makes me want to vomit because I can't take it. Once I'm done recalling how much I cared, I turn to thoughts of how you didnt.
What kind of person would completely abandom their so-called best friend, when you knew how I felt, the day BEFORE I GOT FUCKING EXPELLED! This is what I get for everything I did for you? Fuck you, and Fuck anything you ever said or will say. You wont be captain and You'll be miserable your whole life.

And then you FUCKING TOLD YOUR MOM THE BIGGEST SECRET I HAVE! I fucking hate you. I hate you for invading my thoughts and my actions and my memory and my brain and my nose and my skin and everything that's supposed to be just mine. You ruined me, but, no it's okay, as long as you're able to move on, and you're happy with the backstabbing lying bitch you've become. I'll see you tomorrow night. Now I finally feel how you feel about me. Are you fucking satisfied now?